Details

Written by Matthew Toomey

Created: 12 December 2002

This time around, the film began promisingly. Mr Bond (once again played by Pierce Brosnan) is trying to infiltrate a weapons operation in North Korea.  After a daring getaway, he is captured at the final hurdle and imprisoned and tortured for 14 months.  His captors pressure him to reveal names of his associates by Bond refuses to give in.  With hope seeming lost, his life is suddenly spared.  The British are holding captive a North Korean terrorist and a trade is negotiated between the two parties.  At headquarters, M (Dench) is furious with Bond as it has been rumoured he folded under interrogation and gave names to the North Koreans.  Bond denies of course but M removes him from duty.

But that wouldn’t be much of an adventure, would it?  Bond continues anyway in his quest to seek revenge on the North Korean terrorist and to find out who set him up.  His investigations lead him to Gustav Graves (Stephens) – a wealthy diamond mine operator.  After an action packed introduction at a fencing club, Bond knows Graves to be involved in something sinister.  Soon after, M tracks Bond down to apologise and reinstate him – so now he’s got all the resources of the intelligence behind him (including fast cars and cool gizmos).  He’s going to be assisted by fellow agent Miranda Frost (Pike), who’s been tracking Graves for several months.  Yes, Bond sleeps with her along the way.

Throughout this adventure, Bond keeps running into a feisty woman known initially as Jinx (Berry).  Yep, he sleeps with her too.  She’s clearly out to get Graves also but who is she working for and what is her motive?  Are her and Bond on the same side?

This would be the part where I say the plot thickens but this is Bond film, remember?  The final 45 minutes is an insanely over-the-top, farcical array of action sequences which looks phoney and generates no excitement.  How about an example?  In one scene, James Bond is on an iceberg in a very fast car trying to outrun a giant laser beam that is being shot from the sky via satellite (don’t you hate that).  On reaching the edge, the laser breaks the tip of the iceberg and he plummets into the icy water below.  But wait!  Using the hood of the vehicle as a surfboard and a parachute from the boot, he rides the tidal wave back to safe ground.  Now don’t tell me that it’s just a bit of fun.  Thanks to cheap special effects, the word “plausible” has no meaning.

Oh, and there’s a scene in which instead of shooting Halle Berry, one of the henchman suggests they kill her with a laser beam.  So they leave her unattended while the laser beam moves slowly towards her.  I mean come on – haven’t the directors seen Austin Powers???

The dialogue has stinging wit but again, it’s too much.  The double meanings and sexual innuendoes have become a regular characteristic of a James Bond film but they’re being overused.  Of the cast, Halle Berry leads the pack with her spicy role.  It’s unusual to see Bond working with another female agent (who won’t betray him) and there’s even talk in Hollywood of Berry starting her own spin-off movies.  I pray that Halle turns down the offer because as her Oscar-winning turn in Monster’s Ball showed, she’s better than that.

Details

Written by Matthew Toomey

Created: 28 November 2002

Details

Written by Matthew Toomey

Created: 05 December 2002

Anne Marie Chadwick (Bosworth) was once a junior surfer prodigy and won many titles to justify this claim.  That was until she was injured in a freak surfing accident.  A big wave crushed Anne and she hit her head on the coral reef deep below the water surface.  Since the accident, she’s continued to surf, but isn’t game to take on any more big waves and has avoided all competitions.

Suddenly, she’s given a lifeline.  The women’s Pipe Masters Championship is to be held at her local beach and she’s been given a wild-card entry to challenge the best in the world.  With the help of her friend, Eden (Rodriguez), she’s been practicing hard but still lacks the courage to take on the big waves.  On top of her surfing dramas, Anne is battling hard to care for her younger sister, Penny (Boorem) since their mother walked out on them.

Both Eden and Anne work as housekeeping in a luxury hotel nearby.  In the week leading up to the competition, Anne meets and falls for a visiting football players named Matt (Davis).  The two begins a very quick summer romance but it’s only going to complicate Anne’s life even further.  With all the time she’s spending with Matt, her surfing practice is being neglected.  Further, is Matt just a one-night stand or is there something more permanent in this blossoming romance?  Tough, huh?

Positively, there’s a fresh, hip soundtrack to compliment the surfing.  And whilst it won’t be winning any costume design awards, the small bikinis our stars wear enhances the eye-candy.  You don’t have to be a huge surfing fan to understand most of the story.  There’s a very annoying commentator who’ll explain it all to you during the final competition.

Negatively, the editing really stinks.  There’s some great cinematography but it doesn’t fit together when edited.  From one scene to the next, the waves look different sizes, the characters look different (because of stunt doubles) and the special effects leave a lot to be desired.  I know it’s tough given the scenario (on water) but it is frustrating to watch.  Maybe I’m looking to hard and not enjoying the film for what it is.  Maybe I needed more popcorn.

Details

Written by Matthew Toomey

Created: 28 November 2002

On the verge of starting his second year at school, Harry is warned by a house-elf named Dobby that “Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts this year”.  There is danger afoot but it’s not going to stop Harry - especially considering how bad his home life has become with Uncle Vernon and Aunt Petunia.

Soon after his arrival at Hogwarts, Harry discovers the truth in Dobby’s warnings.  Some of his classmates are found frozen stiff (victim to a spell of petrifaction) and there’s talk that all students will have to be sent home.  Such mayhem is the delight of Lucius Malfoy, a powerful wizard who is rumoured to have links to the Dark Arts.  He can use the attacks as justification to overthrow principal Albus Dumbledore (Harris) and have the school run his way.

Naturally, it’s fallen upon Harry Potter to save the day.  A message written in blood on a corridor wall warns that the Chamber Of Secrets has been opened and the Heir Of Slytheren has arrived.  So what is this Chamber of Secrets?  Who is the Heir of Slytheren?  What is it that Harry can do?

The film’s length needs to be addressed.  For a family film, 161 minutes would be considered an arduous test but with the multitude of characters and lengthy plot, there’s few dull moments.  Judging by the excited reactions from the sold out crowd in my opening night screening, most the audience agreed.  There’s plenty of material to go the distance.

The humour lacking in the first novel has been rediscovered in this adaptation.  Despite not being the first casting choice (Hugh Grant was), Kenneth Branagh is hilarious as the superficial teacher Gilderoy Lockhart.  Seeing the late Richard Harris his final role also brings to the film added sentiment - Harris’s larger role in the sequel is appreciated and he will be sorely missed in future instalments.

Our younger cast members have seen their voices break but talent-wise, they have developed over the past twelve months.  As Harry, Daniel Radcliffe delivers his lines with more confidence - like a new superhero.  Rupert Grint (as Ron) has been given more flexibility and adds much humour with his misadventures and facial expressions.

In the back of your mind, you know the film is flooded with visual effects but it’s impossible to identify the line between truth and fiction.  Director Chris Columbus has returned and once again added much to the project - he has a great knack with kids.  That’ll be it though for Columbus as a new director, Alfonso Cuaron (Y Tu Mama Tambien), has been asked to direct the third film to keep the series fresh.  Expect Harry Potter And The Prisoner Of Azkaban to be released in mid 2004.

Already guaranteed to be a classic, the Chamber Of Secrets has something for everyone.  A dazzling fantasy world that hopefully will appreciated more so, in years to come.

Details

Written by Matthew Toomey

Created: 28 November 2002

Hmmm, let me try to make some sense out of this script although thanks to some dodgy editing and screenplay full of holes, there are some elements that may never be explained.  Alice (Graham) is pretty content with life and has a nice boyfriend.  Walking to work one morning, she reaches to push the pedestrian button at a set of streetlights only to find another gentlemen (Fiennes) pushing the button at the same time.

Their eyes meet - oh my god, it’s true love.  So they wind up going back to his place and making love, um, quite a few times.  The next day, she finds out his name, Adam, and more about him.  He’s a renowned mountain climber who’s previous girlfriend was killed in a nasty avalanche.  Alice immediately breaks up with her current boyfriend, and soon Alice and Adam are married and living together.

But Alice receives notes in the mail and mysterious telephone calls.  They warn her to leave Adam before it is too late.  This suddenly creates doubt in Alice - exactly how much does she know about her husband’s past?  Should she put faith in him or is it time to start investigating the truth in these messages?

Quite frankly, I couldn’t care.  The ending is ludicrous and doesn’t even answer half the questions - that’s really frustrating.  There’s some unusually steamy sex early on in the production to give a bit of spice but it slides away from there.  Everyone just behaves so stupidly and so forcibly to make the script work.

In a quiet theatre (with not too many patrons I might add), the term Killing Me Softly is quite apt.  It’s how I felt sitting there watching that screen.  So please, make sure that you don’t end up feeling the same way - and just see something else!