Details

Written by Matthew Toomey

Created: 31 May 2001

So let’s meet the contenders of series 7.  Two-time defending champion Dawn Lagarto (33) is eight months pregnant but she’s back to fight for her life again - current odds: even money.  Retired Indiana resident Franklin James (72) is a conspiracy theorist and could just be crazy enough to pull this off - current odds: 20-1.  Connecticut student Lindsay Berns (18) has teen support and her high SAT scores may compensate for her lack of experience - current odds: 9-5.  Tony Reilly (38) is an unemployed asbestos-remover and Jersey native whose marriage and life are on the rocks - current odds: 3-1.  Connie Trabucco (53) is a Californian ER nurse who despite being a devout Catholic, knows a thing or two about lethal injections - current odds: 5-1.  Jeffrey Norman (33) is an artist from Connecticut and is terminally ill with testicular cancer so has nothing to lose - current odds: 10-1.

Stay tuned because tonight the first contestant will be killed and a shock revelation will be uncovered.  All this and much more on Series 7: The Contenders.  Warning: Due to the graphic nature of the following program, viewer discretion is advised.

This hilarious spoof is one of the funniest films of the year.  Shot on a shoestring budget from writer/director Daniel Minahan, it pokes fun at television and the recent obsession with reality-based and expose-styled programs.  The film is shot mostly with handheld cameras and looks like a bad episode of Cops as we chase our contestants around.  Every time someone is interviewed, the camera slowly zooms in looking like something you’d see in a soap opera.  The narration and poorly made re-enactments will bring back memories of Hard Copy and Australia’s Most Wanted all over again.  The film even teases us every 10-15 minutes with previews of what’s to come (as if we were going to an add break and they want to hold our attention).

Last week I criticised 15 Minutes for its one-sidedness and it’s ironic that just one week later, I can talk about a film that does the job right.  Series 7: The Contenders doesn’t tell us that television has gone wrong.  If anything, it tells us that whilst often predictable, there are plenty of great ideas and concepts to be explored on the smaller screen.

So make sure you get home from work on time so as not to miss tonight’s Contenders 90-minute marathon where the final winner will be revealed.  Can Dawn defend for the third straight season or will a long-shot pull an upset?  The winner will be revealed...after this break.

Details

Written by Matthew Toomey

Created: 24 May 2001

Good evening ladies and gentlemen and welcome to the Moulin Rouge cabaret club.  Run by the renowned Zidler (Broadbent), it is home of to one of Paris’s luscious courtesans, Satine (Kidman).  With the power to “make men believe what they want to believe”, Satine cannot allow herself the luxury of love and yearns to become a theatrical star.

A middle-class writer named Christian (McGregor) has arrived in town and his “talent” is soon discovered by a small theatrical troupe.  Asking him to craft their new musical, Spectacular Spectacular, they have arranged for him to meet Satine to coerce her to take on the title role.

Simultaneously, Zidler has arranged Satine to meet and court the Duke of Monroth (Roxburgh).  Monroth has agreed to provide the resources to make Satine a star and the money to put Spectacular Spectacular into full production.  His only condition is that Zidler sign a contract that binds Satine exclusively to him and as security, Zidler has put up the deed to the Moulin Rouge.

In a coincidental mix-up, Satine believes Christian to be the Duke and falls in love only to find she has mistaken his identity.  When the real Duke is introduced, Satine’s heart knows she cannot leave Christian and her life is to be torn apart.  Will she risk her career, her dreams and the Moulin Rouge all in the name of love?

Baz Luhrmann’s most recent effort, Romeo And Juliet (with Leonardo DiCaprio and Claire Danes) is a personal all-time favourite and Moulin Rouge utilises many of the concepts he previously explored.  The costumes and sets defy belief and Luhrmann again uses fast editing (particularly in the first half hour) to turn the period-piece genre upside down.  Curiously, the story resembles the Academy Award winning Shakespeare In Love with its tragic tale of hidden love and theatre.

Bringing back memories of classic 60s musicals, Moulin Rouge is anything but conventional.  Despite being set in 1900, over 30 songs are used (some old and some new) with the highlight being Jim Broadbent and Richard Roxburgh’s rendition of Madonna’s Like A Virgin.  You can’t do anything but laugh.  Current musicians also feature with songs from Christina Aguilera, David Bowie and Fat Boy Slim.

As I hinted from the opening phrase, this may be dazzling array of music and colour but without love, there is no story.  During the opening hour, I was hesitant of Kidman and McGregor and failed to see a connection.  Yet as the dramatic conclusion unfolded, the two combined unlike recent screen couples and audience members were left wiping away the tears.  This should serve as a warning to those daring to watch without tissues handy.

Moulin Rouge is the most inventive film so far this year and the entirely Australian production was selected to open the Cannes Film Festival two weeks ago.  Nicole Kidman deserves to be in line for an Oscar nod but the best performance comes from Jim Broadbent as Zidler.  With all the lavish costumes and make-up, even I missed some of the Aussie cameos - keep your eyes peeled for Kylie Minogue, Christine Anu, David Wenham and Garry McDonald.

Love is a word that can never be defined and yet is the single emotion that drives each and every one of us.  It’s almost impossible to express on screen but in very rare instances we see just how powerful love can be.  Moulin Rouge is one such movie.

Details

Written by Matthew Toomey

Created: 24 May 2001

From this point, it’s all a matter of trust.  Wants all the money for himself, Murphy kills the rest of the team in a motel room.  Michael expected just as much and survives thanks to the bullet proof vest he was wearing.  Taking the money himself, Michael escapes with hotel owner Cybil (Cox) and her 9-year-old son and heads north to escape the authorities.  However Murphy is on his tail and the cops aren’t much further behind...

Rated R for its heavy violence, 3000 Miles To Graceland begins well.  I wasn’t sure what the story was about and the opening plays more like a comedy.  Following the robbery, the film takes a darker tone and fizzles with an overly serious weak ending that relies on too many coincidences.  The film is over two hours in length which is an arduous duration to sit through considering the ending isn’t worth it.

Kurt Russell gives a great performance as an Elvis impersonator and the rest of the cast are generally good also.  I’m always plugging good opening credits and this film has some inventively created computer graphics.  3000 Miles To Graceland doesn’t offer much and with much better currently screening, won’t be showing for much longer.

Details

Written by Matthew Toomey

Created: 17 May 2001

On the case is high-profile police officer Eddie Fleming (DeNiro) and fire officer Jordy Warsaw (Burns).  Eddie’s celebrity status has him on the cover of People magazine and a regular on a trashy expose TV show, Top Story, hosted by Robert Hawkins (Grammer).  Karel sees an edition of Top Story profiling a criminal who is receiving millions in book and TV deals for his story which gives him an idea.

Welcome to America - “the country where no one is responsible for what they do” as Karel acutely phrases it.  His plan is to kidnap a high profile celebrity (and what better choice than Eddie Fleming), kill him and sell the video tape to Top Story for a million dollars.  What news network would turn down such exclusive footage?

From the above, you’d think this is a story about how cruel and sick the media can be but the plot is so ludicrous, it’s impossible to believe.  As if anything this bizarre could happen in reality and it plays more like a spoof than a serious cop thriller.  It’s ironic that the film features graphic violence given the message it promotes.  You can’t have your cake and eat it too.

Robert DeNiro and Ed Burns make a great team and save the film from total degeneration.  Watching the two zip across New York hunting for clues is suspenseful and I learnt a few tricks of the trade along the way.  Where exactly has Ed Burns been lately?  This is his first film since Saving Private Ryan three years ago and his performance makes us realise what we’ve missed.

I’m often talking about censorship on screen and am tired of those trying to ban certain material.  It’s all a case of supply and demand - if you don’t watch it, studios will stop making it.  The recent Big Brother Uncut series has resulted in Channel Ten being flooded with abusive letters and emails.  Boohoo.  It is that simple - if you don’t like it, don’t watch it and don’t spoil it for those people who choose to watch.

I won’t continue with my whole “freedom of speech” essay but it’s easy for a film to criticise those that televise shocking material when it doesn’t look at the other side of the argument.  Like most decisions, you have a choice and in this instance you can either go see 15 Minutes or you can stay at home.  I’d advise you to stay home but like any of the reviews I write, is it really going to stop you?

Details

Written by Matthew Toomey

Created: 24 May 2001

Joe Dirt (Spade) was left by his parents at the Grand Canyon when he was eight years old and he’s been on a quest to find them ever since.  His journey is an interesting one, well at least according to radio DJ Zander Kelly (Miller) it is, because he drags Joe into the studio to tell his story live on air.  That’s where the story begins and we soon learn that Joe is not a loser, but a decent human being who is often taken advantage of.

Sorry if I don’t start crying with sentiment but it is a very strange story and I don’t know why the writers (which include Spade) have gone for the schmaltzy ending.  I find Spade a very funny actor and we see him on TV in Just Shoot Me but he’s also been in such hilarious films as Tommy Boy and Senseless.  He still had me chucking in Joe Dirt but I would have preferred to see him tackle more provocative and adventurous humour then the standard gross-out garbage that continues to be served up.

There’s one scene where Joe is covered in liquefied shit and that seemed to get the biggest laugh from the audience.  Now do you understand why I’m not glowing with praise?  In two weeks, Freddie Got Fingered will be released which threatens to go even further into the pit.  I am already bracing myself for the experience.